Today I will fight the battle of wills-my will vs. God’s will. “I must get the thing settled between my self and God in the secret places of my soul where no stranger intermeddles…” “The reason the battle is not won is because I try to win it in the external world first. Get alone with God, fight it out before Him, settle the matter there once and for all.” (Chambers, Utmost, December 27).
The consequence of losing, meaning that my will prevails, can be found in Jeremiah 3-4. My soul will be like a land destroyed:
I looked at the mountains, and they were quaking; all the hills shook.
I looked, and there was no human being, and all the birds of the sky had fled.
I looked, and the fertile field was a wilderness.
All its cities were torn down because of the Lord and his burning anger.
Jeremiah 4:24-26
Today I will go to God’s altar to surrender my will, to lose the battle I do not want to win.